Arte Johnson
1) Evil Toons
Author
Language
English
Description
Burt has a cleaning company and hires four women to clean an isolated house. They find an old book, a dagger and a soul shred and when one of them, Megan, reads an incantation, she unleashes an evil beast in our world.
2) Bad monkey
Author
Series
Andrew Yancy novels volume 1
Pub. Date
2013
Language
English
Formats
Description
Andrew Yancy, late of the Miami Police, soon-to-be-late of the Key West Police, has a human arm in his freezer. There is a logical explanation for that, but not for how and why it parted from its owner. Yancy thinks the boating-accident/shark-luncheon explanation is full of holes, and if he can prove murder, his commander might relieve him of Health Inspector duties, aka Roach Patrol. But first Yancy will negotiate an ever-surprising course of events,...
Author
Series
Willoughbys volume 1
Language
English
Formats
Description
In this tongue-in-cheek take on classic themes in children's literature, the four Willoughby children set about to become "deserving orphans" after their neglectful parents embark on a treacherous around-the-world adventure, leaving them in the care of an odious nanny.
Author
Series
The Brixton Brothers volume 3
Language
English
Formats
Description
Steve Brixton is in retirement, and not even grand theft auto can bring him back for one last job. Period, the end, that's that. Right???
After finding out that his favorite author (and author of the definitive Bailey Brothers Guidebook) was not the man Steve thought he was, the Brixton Brothers detective agency is officially out of business. Steve has a new job now: taking out the trash for five bucks a week.
But when he...
After finding out that his favorite author (and author of the definitive Bailey Brothers Guidebook) was not the man Steve thought he was, the Brixton Brothers detective agency is officially out of business. Steve has a new job now: taking out the trash for five bucks a week.
But when he...
Author
Language
English
Description
Don Wade has proved himself to be golf's master storyteller. He returns once again with this truly delightful collection of real-life stories from and about the world's greatest golfers. This collection of anecdotes brings together past heroes like Ben Hogan and Sam Snead and living legends like Chi-Chi Rodriguez and Jack Nicklaus with current stars of today. You'll hear about Frank Sinatra's flirtation with golf, the day Gene Sarazen almost caused...
Author
Language
English
Description
Best-selling golf writer and historian Don Wade returns with another collection of real-life stories from the greatest players ever to compete in the game. Wade brings together living legends, past champions, and contemporary stars in one entertaining audio that is worth more than a dozen how-to books. The perfect off-course amusement for the aficionado or player, And then Tiger Told the Shark is performed by Arte Johnson, himself a seasoned golfer...
Author
Language
English
Description
This collection of anecdotes-from Golf Digest editor Don Wade-brings out of the locker room and onto the green an engaging treasury of more than 100 of the greatest golf stories ever told from the game's legends: Ben Hogan, Nancy Lopez, Fred Couples, and others. From Augusta National to Royal St. George, this entertaining, intimate, and funny audio takes you onto some of the best courses alongside the greatest players in the world.
Author
Language
English
Description
In 2001, the government was seized by a ne'er-do-well rich boy and his elderly henchmen. Our great economic expansion unraveled, our water was poisoned, and SUVs advanced like a plague of locusts.
Michael Moore has a lot to say and isn't holding back. The powerful are the target-particularly a group that laid waste to the world as we know it-and still are: stupid white men. In this bleakly funny work, Moore reveals how the great and the good screw...
Author
Pub. Date
2014
Language
English
Formats
Description
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A collection of the best Miami Herald columns from the New York Times bestselling author of Squeeze Me on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system.
If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best...
If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best...
Author
Series
The Brixton Brothers volume 1
Language
English
Formats
Description
National treasures, criminal masterminds, and...secret agent librarians?
Steve Brixton wants to be a crime-busting detective—just like his favorite crime-busting detectives, the Bailey Brothers. Turns out, though, that real life is nothing like the stories.
When Steve borrows the wrong book from the library, he finds himself involved in a treasonous plot that pits him against helicopter-rappelling librarians, has him outwitting...
Steve Brixton wants to be a crime-busting detective—just like his favorite crime-busting detectives, the Bailey Brothers. Turns out, though, that real life is nothing like the stories.
When Steve borrows the wrong book from the library, he finds himself involved in a treasonous plot that pits him against helicopter-rappelling librarians, has him outwitting...
Author
Series
The Brixton Brothers volume 2
Pub. Date
2010
Language
English
Formats
Description
Steve Brixton, top detective, rescuer of quilts and also America, has opened up his own agency. He has a crime lab that doubles as a bedroom. He has a chum named Dana. And he has lots of business cards.
So when the Fairview Diamond goes missing, he knows just what to do. But when a simple track-and-retrieve spirals out of control, Steve finds himself in the middle of his biggest case yet: MacArthur Bart, the author of Steve's beloved Bailey...
So when the Fairview Diamond goes missing, he knows just what to do. But when a simple track-and-retrieve spirals out of control, Steve finds himself in the middle of his biggest case yet: MacArthur Bart, the author of Steve's beloved Bailey...
12) Bad Dogs Have More Fun: Selected Writings on Family, Animals and Life from the Philadelphia Inquirer
Author
Language
English
Description
This is an unforgettable collection of more than 75 newspaper columns by John Grogan, the New York Times best-selling author of Marley & Me. Combining humor, wit, poignancy, and affection, these columns provide insight into the intriguing and wonderful world we live in. Whether writing about animals (from dogs to elephants to geese!), life's foibles and farces, family (not just his own), or interactions with memorable people, John Grogan makes us...
Author
Language
English
Description
One of America's most beloved writers, Lilian Jackson Braun-author of twenty-four Cat Who... mysteries-becomes the subject of a mystery herself. In this spoof by one of her most ardent admirers, Braun's beheaded body has been discovered in the men's room of a gay bar in Lower Manhattan. The police are baffled, and so it is up to Braun's eccentric writer friend, James Q. (Qafka), and his Siamese cats Ying-Ton and Poon-Tang to solve the ghastly mystery....
Author
Language
English
Description
Today’s Generation iY (teens brought up with the internet) and Homelanders (children born after 9/11) are overexposed to information at an earlier age than ever and paradoxically are underexposed to meaningful relationships and real-life experiences. Artificial Maturity addresses the problem of what to do when parents and teachers mistake children’s superficial knowledge for real maturity. The book is filled with practical steps that adults can...
Author
Language
English
Description
Since Dave Barry writes about weird things, you might be tempted to think he has a weird brain. He does, of course, but that's not the whole explanation: A lot of the things he writes about-exploding Pop-Tarts, for example-are real. Join Dave as he examines UFO thrill-seekers and Elvis-worshippers, runs for president, and plays Claptonesque guitar in the world's most literary band that includes Stephen King (The Rock-Bottom Remainders).
In Dave's...
Author
Language
English
Description
Fitness and vitality can be yours, writes Dave Barry-provided you have the discipline, drive, and the plain old-fashioned guts required to procure the necessary steroids. This manual may help, too, but you'll just have to buy it and find out. Barry on executive fitness: Today's top executives eat teeny meals and run ten miles and play tennis and work out every day. Of course, they're so busy getting fit that many don't even know where their offices...
Author
Language
English
Description
Tupperware ladies, eighties people, and leisure concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe! In this collection of eighty essays, the inimitable columnist observes everything that makes America the unique, special place you've grown to love: taxes, toilets, airbags, baseball, beer commercials, and numerous other American artifacts.
With his beloved brand of zany humor, Barry covers it all, from lauding the little-appreciated...
18) Absurdistan
Author
Language
English
Description
2007 Audie® Award Finalist - Literary Fiction
"With the enormous success of the critically acclaimed The Russian Debutante’s Handbook, Gary Shteyngart established himself as one of the most talented writers of his generation. Open Absurdistan and meet our hero, the outsize Misha Vainberg, son of the 1,238th-richest man in Russia, lover of large portions of food and drink, lover and inept performer of rap music,
...19) Mercury
Author
Series
Language
English
Description
A tale of revenge and technological endeavor set on our solar system's most desolate stage. Despite Mercury's desolation, there are still those who hope to find diamonds in the rough. Saito Yamagata thinks Mercury's position will make it an ideal orbit point for satellites that could someday create enough power to propel starships into deep space. He hires Dante Alexios to bring his dreams to life. Astrobiologist Victor Molina thinks the water at...
Author
Language
English
Description
Ever notice how bad song lyrics get stuck in your head? It's not just you. After Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry's column about this tendency, reader response was enormous. But Barry didn't know what he was getting himself into when he invited his Legion of Alert Readers to submit their nominees in the Bad Song Survey. "Song badness," he soon learned, "is an issue that Americans care deeply about."
Encompassing such categories as "songs...